Sydney Millage

Why I Wrote “Sanctuary….”

A woman noticed my nametag as we stood in line. “Did you write that book in the bookstore?” she asked. When I told her I had, she shared her own story of domestic abuse, then she wanted to know mine. I fumbled for an answer. In the year since the book was published, she was the first and many others have asked. “Why did I write Sanctuary?”

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I could tell you that in a group of women close to me, 3 of 5 have experienced domestic abuse. Or I could tell you that when it was time to write my master’s thesis, my husband wisely asked, “What counseling situation is most difficult?” Or I could say that the department chair suggested researching physical domestic violence when I wanted to write on how to respond biblically to a sinning husband.

Here is the truth. One morning, instead of meeting in my office, I met a woman in her home because her husband made her choose between money for groceries or money for gas. They had fought most of the night. We sat at her kitchen table and when she brought up the topic of divorce I asked where he was. She calmly replied that he was sleeping in a nearby bedroom. That didn’t feel particularly safe or smart, so we took our conversation outside.

We had met many times and discussed different facets of life. As I desperately prayed for words and direction, we turned to Matthew 22:37-40 and I asked, “If you continue the way things are now, is it possible to love God with your mind, soul, and strength? Are you free to have a personal relationship with God? (Read your Bible, pray, and attend church?)” Yes, she said, that was not an issue. “And if you continue as you are now, are you loving your husband and children well? Can you do what is best for them?” No, she answered. She could not continue living this way without giving in to sinful lifestyle choices, constant chaos and fear. Loving her husband meant making changes, dangerous ones. If she chose to love God and her neighbor, those changes could lead to removing herself and their children for their safety and his overall well-being. He needed help and they a) couldn’t fight against his sin and b) didn’t have the resources to fight their own under his influence, c) would continue to be in danger and d) were harboring a criminal by not reporting him (physical assault/domestic violence is a crime).

I offered to go with her to the courthouse and file a protective order. She said she couldn’t. She wasn’t ready. We talked about safety plans, contacting extended family, daily schedules and opportunities, but I quickly realized this was not about surface issues. There were struggles deep in her soul and mind that had to be overcome for her to step out of the cycle of violence to safety from the man who controlled and undermined her every move and resource.

As we walked through the weeks and months that followed, God more than provided for her needs financially, spiritually, and practically. He also gave her miraculous courage and insight into herself, her husband and children. With help from family, friends, the local church, law enforcement and social service agencies, she and her husband received counseling and multiple opportunities for change. She chose change, Jesus Christ, and freedom. He chose himself.

I continue to meet with women whose husbands sin against them, armed with the truth that only Jesus works change and is worthy of worship. Through Christ, God’s Word, His Spirit, and His people are vital tools that empower and enable victims to become victors. The odds against victims of abuse are overwhelming. Coercion, confusion, belittling, demeaning, violent behavior traps them against their will. Even after building up gumption to leave temporarily, women return to abusive relationships an average of 7 times before leaving permanently. But God has a better solution.

Only God can make the local church aware that some men prey on and use their wives as objects instead of equals. God can put it in women’s hearts to search out, pray for, and come alongside the suffering. God can provide His Spirit though salvation in Christ, newness of life, courage and a desire to do things differently. God can change hearts and lives of not just victims, but abusers, and the entire local church. God can provide secular resources and legal intervention to provide for their practical needs.

Sanctuary: Help and Hope for Victims of Domestic Abuse is not about changing the dynamics or circumstances of domestic abuse. It’s a look into the heart of our God who comes alongside the suffering soul, providing comfort, healing, and help. Sanctuary empowers victims of domestic abuse to use Scripture as a means of change and loving others–not according to their own understanding–but in a courageous, biblical way that calls others to respond to God as the Judge, the Avenger, and, potentially, personal Savior from sin and God’s deserved wrath.

I wrote Sanctuary because the gospel is the power of God to salvation to everyone who believes. God’s Word is living and active. God’s Word is a healing balm of grace and mercy.

The law of the Lord is perfect, restoring the soul;
The testimony of the Lord is sure, making wise the simple.
The precepts of the Lord are right, rejoicing the heart;
The commandment of the Lord is pure, enlightening the eyes.
The fear of the Lord is clean, enduring forever;
The judgments of the Lord are true; they are righteous altogether.
They are more desirable than gold, yes, than much fine gold;
Sweeter also than honey and the drippings of the honeycomb.
Moreover, by them Your servant is warned;
In keeping them there is great reward. (Psalm 119:7-11)

The Value of Evil

Lately I have been overwhelmed by the wickedness of man. When someone experiences unspeakable evil it attacks both the mind–that’s trauma, it’s real–and the heart. Hopelessness. Emptiness. Loss. We want it to go away; to cease and desist. Pat answers and platitudes do nothing less than throw oil on the fire.

Instead, it’s time to admit that nothing makes evil good–not knowledge of God’s character, not truth, salvation, or time. None of them magically transform wrong to right. Evil is evil. Wrong is wrong. The depravity of man will never be excused or justified. God will judge. He will avenge. He will repay.

Our legal systems cannot exact justice. They are God’s minister for good–but as a pale shadow: incomplete, crooked, powerless to discern and punish evil in kind.

Circumstances do not exact justice. The wicked are unfazed. In instances of domestic abuse, the abuser does not suffer a lack of friends, resources, opportunity, getting his own way. It’s unfair and unjust.

So asked myself, “Why evil, God?” It doesn’t go away. Nothing makes it better. Nothing changes it or colors it beautiful. Violence is violence. Deception is deception. Rape is rape. Over and over and over.

The beauty of who God is reminded me that, however dark and hopeless the evil, His light and grace are greater. He does not wipe away evil, He overcomes it. He does not excuse wickedness, He erases its power. He does not right wrongs, He uses them for His own purpose.

That is why we never downplay suffering. The depth, width, and breadth of pain and sorrow is not diminished by God, it is covered and filled. Re-purposed. Evil pushes us to a greater awareness of God’s mercy, power and love. Jesus became that sin–that ugly, hideous, twisted evil. God punished Jesus as if he was the one choking his wife on the floor. God punished Jesus as if he was the one molesting a child. God punished Jesus as if he was the one demanding his way, pushing, slamming, breaking, yelling, cursing, spitting. It was not a small thing. Jesus’ death in our place was the biggest thing. God exacted justice, His wrath was poured out in full, to the dregs, on His only precious, perfect Son, Jesus Christ. That’s how great He is. That’s how loving, just, gentle, kind, and good our God is.

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That also means Jesus was punished for my sin. Jesus was punished as the one who is weak, who fails, who is needy and broken. He was broken for me. He was bruised for me. He was oppressed and afflicted for me. That’s how amazing He is.

What is the value of evil? Evil reveals the goodness of God. Man’s depravity reveals a small taste of His immense grace. Does that make evil good? Never. Excuse wickedness? No. Ease the reality of suffering? Not necessarily. But in Christ, we have hope. Purpose. Endurance. Peace. Motivation to please Him and love others; to do what is necessary, good and right in spite of our circumstances. Through faith in Jesus’ death and resurrection, we are given the Spirit of promise; we are transformed, made new, and empowered to walk in newness of life. God. is. bigger.

Therefore, since we have this ministry, as we received mercy, we do not lose heart, but we have renounced the things hidden because of shame, not walking in craftiness or adulterating the word of God, but by the manifestation of truth commending ourselves to every man’s conscience in the sight of God. And even if our gospel is veiled, it is veiled to those who are perishing, in whose case the god of this world has blinded the minds of the unbelieving so that they might not see the light of the gospel of the glory of Christ, who is the image of God. For we do not preach ourselves but Christ Jesus as Lord, and ourselves as your bond-servants for Jesus’ sake. For God, who said, “Light shall shine out of darkness,” is the One who has shone in our hearts to give the Light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Christ.

But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, so that the surpassing greatness of the power will be of God and not from ourselves; we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying about in the body the dying of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body. For we who live are constantly being delivered over to death for Jesus’ sake, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So death works in us, but life in you.

But having the same spirit of faith, according to what is written, “I believed, therefore I spoke,” we also believe, therefore we also speak, knowing that He who raised the Lord Jesus will raise us also with Jesus and will present us with you. For all things are for your sakes, so that the grace which is spreading to more and more people may cause the giving of thanks to abound to the glory of God.

Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4)

Mirror, Mirror on the Wall

Much like a mirror, we view life through our eyes–looking out from the inside. Even when we think we’re looking in, we’re looking at ourselves through ourselves. For that reason, none of us is objective. That’s why the Word of God and the people of God are vital.

man in mirror

An abuser sees the victim as an object designed to meet his needs (not a person, not the image of God, not even a servant, but someone “less than”). The focus is himself. Pride skews the way he look at life. Every wrong is deflected onto his chosen target. Is everyone guilty? Sometimes. But more often, there is an individual who could, if she chose, put him in the center and make his life easier, better, more fitting. He is entitled; she is an interference, an obstacle. His reality is the only reality.

Victims often see themselves at fault. They should be able to right the world–his world–and bring about change. Her reality is subject to his. If only she could align with his wants, needs, and desires, life wouldn’t be so difficult or painful. Unfortunately, his reality changes constantly. She’s off balance, unable to stay grounded, at his service.

Both have a distorted view of God, themselves, and others. At home, abusers exhibit little to no dependence on God. Victims depend on their abuser. Failure results in punishment. This is not a case of “It takes 2 bears to make a bear fight.” This is domination and control.

Although abusers sin greatly against the victim, it’s a cat and mouse game few see. Those privy to the truth have no voice or are quickly discounted in light of the abuser’s influence, affluence, personality, charisma, persona.

Many in the church have no idea. They, too, see the situation through their own eyes, assuming that the husband is–of course–caring for his wife and children, representing his side of the story accurately, and, though frustrated, painting his wife in the best light possible. Many also assume that the wife is ungrateful for her husband’s care, exaggerates his faults, and fails to live up to her role.

Applying the Word of God to what is seen or reported is difficult. The examination must be private, comprehensive, and invasive. An abuser’s heart seeks his own, justifies sinful behavior, and is unwilling to sacrifice his agenda for the benefit of his spouse (for others, yes, but not for her). A victim seeks to please her spouse (remember the consequences? Imagine the weeks, months, years; the habits and thought processes that have led her here). She, too, minimizes her abuser’s words and behavior (it’s shameful and embarrassing for anyone else to hear or see the demoralizing treatment. They would cringe. She cringes just thinking about their pity or, worse, agreement with her abuser.). She has little to no agenda other than survival and avoiding punishment and reproach.

Can you say, “This is wrong”? “This is shameful”? “This is not the way Christ loves the Church”? This is not Christian marriage. Take His name out of it. Whether those involved claim to be Christians or not, this is controlling, illegal behavior. Prayerfully look beyond your own mirror into the face of Christ. What do you see?

For the word of God is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword, and piercing as far as the division of soul and spirit, of both joints and marrow, and able to judge the thoughts and intentions of the heart. And there is no creature hidden from His sight, but all things are open and laid bare to the eyes of Him with whom we have to do.

Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but One who has been tempted in all things as we are, yet without sin. Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. (Hebrews 4:12-16)

Two Sides to Every Story

Proverbs 18:17 says, “The first to plead his case seems right, Until another comes and examines him.” Those who help individuals settle disputes and live at peace depend on this principle. In most people situations, this works. But a proverb is a proverb, not a promise–it’s true most of the time, given the right circumstances.

This verse does not say, “The first to plead her case seems right, until another disagrees,” or “proves her wrong.” It actually says nothing about the other person. It simply teaches that we need to be careful and examine a situation before reaching a conclusion. This is especially true in relation to domestic abuse. It’s important to seek and gain knowledge–not only from those involved–but also from God’s Word and people. Knowledge about domestic abuse, any abuse, is cause to stop and look differently.

unhpapy couple

The underlying assumption of many, especially men, is that a husband and wife stand on equal footing. It’s true: people are people. But in a Christian marriages, a woman honors God by placing herself under her husband’s authority. This is her gift to him. Husbands are not responsible for a wife’s submission. Wives are not responsible for a husband’s love, that’s his responsibility. 1 Peter 3:7 says,

“You husbands in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with someone weaker, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered.”

A wife who submits to her husband is weaker because she willingly forfeits her desires and autonomy to his headship, trusting God to use and direct him in meeting her needs. They’re a team with different roles. Each one has the equal value. Each is a person made in the image of God with the same attributes and essence. With practice, a husband and wife communicate and follow to God’s direction together as the husband leads and the wife assists. Because she does not call the shots or bear the weight of decisions, she is in a weaker position both practically and experientially. She is not powerless to disagree, confront wrong, pray, and depend on others, but she trusts God to provide through her husband’s leadership.

To the degree that her husband considers her “a fellow heir of grace,” and loves her as Christ loves the church, Christian marriage is a beautiful, supernatural picture of goodness. But when a man views his wife as an object to meet his desires, she is doubly, sinfully disadvantaged. She must learn to rightly divide Scripture and please God in spite of her husband.

It’s also important to recognize that the most prevalent predator of women is men. Statistics speak for themselves: sexual harassment, assault, abuse, stalking, trafficking, or murder. Men who refuse to submit to the gospel and work of Christ are deceived and deceiving; driven by desire. In fact, domestic violence causes more injuries to women than accidents, muggings, and rapes combined.* Women carry keys a certain way, examine their surroundings, plan where, when, and how they travel, anticipate and prepare for danger on a daily, if not hourly, basis. We train and educate our daughters differently than sons because of dangerous men. I do not avoid men in general. I am not embittered against them nor do I wish evil on anyone based on gender, but I am always aware.

Those who address the concerns of a woman reporting (or disclosing) abuse often overlook this simple fact: in cases of abuse, men are dangerous and women are disadvantaged. This is not one-on-one conflict. It is a teeter-totter in which one individual sits at the bottom and makes demands of a captive held aloft and alone.

Investigate? Yes, by all means. Ask questions, take notes, collect documentation. Assume she is on even standing with her abuser? Absolutely not.

The way you apply this proverb could easily set her up for injury and punishment. This happens when you break her confidence as a means of getting his side of the story or question the two of them together. Instead, question them separately. Give her side additional weight and confidentiality. Involve individuals who understand abuse and have the ability to discern the situation without endangering or threatening her safety. This may mean using secular sources and/or older women in the church who can be trusted to love, care, pray with and for her.

This is not a simple disagreement. This is oppression, buried under layers of deception, peppered with coercive, covert tactics. You will not get 2 sides of the same story. You will get 2 altogether different stories because one is driven by power and the other is subject to it. God knows. Seek His help. Apply His understanding and reflect His heart: oppose the proud, give grace to the humble.

Help, Lord, for the godly man ceases to be,
For the faithful disappear from among the sons of men.
They speak falsehood to one another;
With flattering lips and with a double heart they speak.
May the Lord cut off all flattering lips,
The tongue that speaks great things;
Who have said, “With our tongue we will prevail;
Our lips are our own; who is lord over us?” (Psalm 12:1-4)

*https://www.dosomething.org/us/facts/11-facts-about-domestic-and-dating-violence

Moon and Sun

Nature reflects God’s eternal nature and glory–none of us would deny it. And just as the moon reflects the light of the sun, we are created to reflect the light of God.

Moon and sun

Unfortunately, many of us think we’re stars. Abusive individuals are like that. In longing for adoration and approval from some, they put selfish, ungodly demands on others. They don’t realize we’re all moons. Instead of using God’s light to serve others, they bow to another god altogether. That god may be power, money, status, titles, possessions, or influence. They are blinded to the fact that this worship is about themselves, not the object. They want power to feel powerful, control to fight off fear, possessions, money, titles, and status to feel valuable and important. It is not about the opinions of others as much as how those opinions reflect their worth. In that way, they continue to be moons–reflecting the pale, limited light that comes from other darkened moons.

Isn’t it interesting that Jesus said,

“The eye is the lamp of the body; so then if your eye is clear, your whole body will be full of light. But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light that is in you is darkness, how great is the darkness!

“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.” (Matthew 6:22-24)

In realizing an abusive individual is not a star or sun, we acknowledge that they do not deserve our adoration or glory the way God does. In fact, when we put everyone on a level playing field and God in His rightful place, we begin to question an abuser’s demands. We call individuals “abusive” when they abuse the power and influence God has given, using it for themselves instead of serving others. To allow one’s self to be used as another’s light source doesn’t work, either. Only God is self-sufficient and independent; the Source of all light and glory.

Some use the Scripture, “the woman is the glory of man” (1 Corinthians 11:7), to imply that a wife should never dishonor her husband. Take another look. That statement is preceded by the phrase, “man… is the image and glory of God.” Man is to reflect–and represent–the wonder and beauty of God. As He does, his wife will reflect that goodness in her own life.

A godly, loving, sacrificial man is seen in his influence on his wife and family. When he loves them well, cares for their needs, is sensitive to their struggles, prays for/with them, and gives of himself, it will be evident in their contentment, joy, peace, generosity, and gracious responses. They will love others and reflect God in their relationships and faith-filled responses to life.

A glory-hoarding, anxious, demanding, stingy, manipulative man is seen in his influence on his wife and family. When he demands adoration, affection, respect, attention, and care for himself at the expense of others, it will be evident in his family’s unhappiness, discontent, fear, anxiety, and inability to serve others. They are bound by chains of power and control; stifled, hurting, isolated, waning. They reflect his glory.

The Greek word for “glory,” means an opinion, view, splendor, or brightness. A woman will reflect her husband in the same way he reflects God.

All that to say, if you live with an abusive man, God does not expect you to be something you’re not. He isn’t asking you to be one way in public and another in private. He says, “It is what it is.” Your job is simply to reflect the sun. The question is, “Who is your Sun?” If the Lord Jesus is the center of your universe, you can reflect Him well even while responding honestly and courageously to a wicked man. If another moon is your sun, you will wither and wane; your light is but darkness.

Come to the only true Light. He will not cast you out. He is there to rescue, deliver, and care.

O Lord God of hosts, hear my prayer;
Give ear, O God of Jacob! Selah.
Behold our shield, O God,
And look upon the face of Your anointed.
For a day in Your courts is better than a thousand outside.
I would rather stand at the threshold of the house of my God
Than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
For the Lord God is a sun and shield;
The Lord gives grace and glory;
No good thing does He withhold from those who walk uprightly.
O Lord of hosts,
How blessed is the man who trusts in You! (Psalm 84:8-12)

The Conscience and Domestic Abuse

“It can’t be!” “It’s not possible.”

These are natural responses when a victim discloses the truth, especially to mutual friends and family members. We want to think people know better, that the abuser has a conscience, that no one would knowingly treat a loved one with cruelty and contempt. That’s simply not true.

The noetic effect of sin–the fact that the Fall affects our mind and intellect–is spoken of in Romans 1:

“…the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth.” (Romans 1:18 ESV, emphasis added)

Young Angry Man.

Since sin affects every part of our thinking and being, the conscience is not exempt. Some of us feel guilty for doing things that are not wrong. Others don’t feel guilty for doing things that are. The conscience, like our desires, habits, and thinking, must be trained and changed by the Word of God. It is only as we rightly divide the word of truth and submit to God that our thinking and conscience is changed. When our thinking is transformed, it will change our desires, thoughts, and actions (Romans 12:1-2).

The individual who is driven by self-fulfillment and ambition will stop at nothing to achieve it. In fact, “where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there. ” (James 3:16). An individual motivated by greed and self-seeking views others as objects. They either serve his agenda or interfere with it. They are not equal to his status or existence. His desires and perceived needs rule his world. In his way of thinking, those who deny his standards, demands or preferences are drop-dead wrong because he is always right. He has rights. Undeniable, inalienable rights. Who are you to refuse or tell him no?

A man who lives for himself uses what the Bible calls, “differing weights and measures.” He is the standard. His desires are preeminent resulting in disorder, chaos, and evil. He often uses manipulation and deception to express his desires lest self-exaltation come into the light and be revealed for what it is: prideful, deadly sin.

God doesn’t pull punches. He diagnoses and judges the problem this way:

Differing weights and differing measures, Both of them are abominable to the Lord. (Proverbs 20:10).

Applying a set of standards to one’s self and another set of standards to others runs contrary to God’s character. Jesus died for each and every person. The weight and cost of sin is astronomical. It doesn’t set one person over another. Our sin’s testimony is so great “that every mouth may be closed and all the world may become accountable to God” (Romans 3:19). An individual who applies a different set of rules to different people sins against God. People are people. God does not show partiality. “But if you show partiality, you are committing sin and are convicted by the law as transgressors” (James 2:9).

Because an abuser shows partiality–primarily to himself, but also to those whose opinion matters–his conscience is twisted. Not only does he view others as objects who exist to serve him, he may see himself as god/God and his wife’s response as a measure of her spirituality or righteousness. Unfortunately, this is taught in some church circles, creating destruction and havoc, denying Christ as the Savior and focus of worship. As a result, man’s conscience is hardened and he fails to respond in a Christlike way to biblical criteria or conviction (1 Timothy 4:1-2),

To the pure, all things are pure, but to the defiled and unbelieving, nothing is pure; but both their minds and their consciences are defiled. They profess to know God, but they deny him by their works. They are detestable, disobedient, unfit for any good work. (Titus 1:15-16)

A husband’s seared conscience affects his wife and children. If she believes her husband is in the place of God, a woman views his approval or disapproval as tantamount. This muddies the waters of abuse and makes confrontation next to impossible. He is god? Who is she to disagree? Children join a father’s tirades against an oppressed mother in thought, word, and action. The noetic effect of sin multiplies as it is sown–father, mother, children, extended family, church family, friends. Consciences that do not submit to the Word of God blindly excuse and justify sin and its consequences.

If you are experiencing abuse, turn to God. He sees what is happening whether anyone believes you or not. Whether you feel crazy, confused, downtrodden, or forgotten. God is on your side. Cry out. Seek help. Immerse yourself in the hope and truth of God’s Word. He can and will help you.

Church, beware. Using differing weights and measures applies to us as well. If we have a different standard for an abuser (i.e. as the husband, he can make ungodly demands, exercise injustice, and practice ungodliness in his home) than the abused (i.e., as the wife, you must submit to your husband “in everything“), we, too, are committing an abomination before the Lord. We have given in to lies instead of renewing our mind and being transformed by the truth of God.

Woe to those who call evil good, and good evil;
Who substitute darkness for light and light for darkness;
Who substitute bitter for sweet and sweet for bitter! (Isaiah 5:20)

We are called to be the body of Christ–to do what He would do, love what He loves, think as He thinks, desire what He desires, and follow our Head. May He be pleased and glorified as we exalt Him, His truth and righteousness.

Praise the Lord!
Praise the Lord, O my soul!
I will praise the Lord while I live;
I will sing praises to my God while I have my being.
Do not trust in princes,
In mortal man, in whom there is no salvation.
His spirit departs, he returns to the earth;
In that very day his thoughts perish.
How blessed is he whose help is the God of Jacob,
Whose hope is in the Lord his God,
Who made heaven and earth,
The sea and all that is in them;
Who keeps faith forever;
Who executes justice for the oppressed;
Who gives food to the hungry.
The Lord sets the prisoners free.

The Lord opens the eyes of the blind;
The Lord raises up those who are bowed down;
The Lord loves the righteous;
The Lord protects the strangers;
He supports the fatherless and the widow,
But He thwarts the way of the wicked.
The Lord will reign forever,
Your God, O Zion, to all generations.
Praise the Lord! (Psalm 146, emphasis added)

Submit in Everything?

One biblical reason women fail to cry out–and churches fail to help–is a misunderstanding of the word, “everything” in Ephesians 5:24. “But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything.”

Watch this video to understand the context and heart of God behind this controversial verse:

Click on this link to view video.

(PS–this is a trial run–folks on Sanctuary’s Facebook page, sorry for the repetition. This may or may not work… Stay tuned.)