Seeing the big picture--beyond the suffering, loss, and unknown--gives us hope. And with hope, God provides comfort, courage and endurance.
Many women who experience punishment or consequences as a result of displeasing their husband are told by said husband, churches, pastors, family and friends that they are unforgiving. "The Bible says to forgive seventy times seven. If you don't forgive, you're the one holding a grudge." There are a lot of things packed into the … Continue reading Seventy Times Seven
It's time for something positive--for good news, for a new outlook, a fresh take on life. There is no better positive, good, new, fresh, wonderful thing than Jesus. https://www.youtube.com/embed/CoIfH4V2PQE I have told women who wonder about marrying an individual that if their husband is becoming more like Jesus, they will continue to fall in love … Continue reading Adding Jesus Changes Everything
Abusive relationships breed confusion: shame, anger, pity, love, guilt, frustration, fear. If that's your bag, it's time to ask questions and get help. One of those feelings and filters that affects all of life is shame. It eats away at us in quiet moments, in the dark of night, in between this and that. If … Continue reading Shame vs. Guilt
In relationships that are off-balance, whether you define yours as abusive or not, there is a sense of one-way love. One individual is always giving, flexing, changing, doing. The other is always receiving, demanding, taking. Part of recognizing an abusive relationship is seeing that pattern for what it is. It is not balanced, other-focused, or … Continue reading Love is Not Mutually Exclusive
A woman noticed my nametag as we stood in line. "Did you write that book in the bookstore?" she asked. When I told her I had, she shared her own story of domestic abuse, then she wanted to know mine. I fumbled for an answer. In the year since the book was published, she was … Continue reading Why I Wrote “Sanctuary….”
One biblical reason women fail to cry out--and churches fail to help--is a misunderstanding of the word, "everything" in Ephesians 5:24. "But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything." Watch this video to understand the context and heart of God behind this controversial … Continue reading Submit in Everything?
Those who use power and control as weapons use them well. Think of hand-to-hand combatants in the movies: Matt Damon, Keanu Reeves, Jackie Chan, Bruce Lee. That's an abuser in a nutshell. It's what you're up against--what victims of abuse experience--only it isn't one scene and it's not a movie. It's real life. Over. And … Continue reading Repentance
Years ago while visiting a friend, the phone rang. From the far end of the house I heard a small, shrill voice rise and continue. "Aren't you going to answer the phone?" I asked. "Not yet," she said. The sound got louder and clearer, "Get outta the way! Move! Move! Move!" The young tornado ran … Continue reading Get Outta the Way!
We are all familiar with suffering the consequences of making a poor decision. Children refuse to wear the clothing their parents tell them to and suffer as a result. We like to think that those who cheat, lie, steal, and hurt others will suffer the consequences of their behavior, but we don't always see it. … Continue reading Unjust Suffering